Air pollution is rampant, global tolerance is stretching thin, and just this morning hecklerspray saw a half-dozen waddling ducks with their heads stuck in one of those plastic six-pack ring thingies.
But you know what? None of that matters. That's right, the sun is still shining, there's a thousand butterflies twittering outside our office window, and we're pretty sure we just found a skittle left over from yesterday's mid-day snack. "Why the good mood, hecklerspray ol' chum?" you may be asking. "Because the Britney Spears/Kevin Federline video-graphic sex-romp doesn't exist at all," we're definitely answering.
Yup, according to Federline's lawyer, there is no such tape, and anyone claiming otherwise is an effing liar with rat-like qualities. Now that's not an exact quote mind you, it's just our interpretation of the message the lawyer-guy was trying to drive home.
