Congratulations to our internet friend JULIE GREEN! She has won the $250 gift certificate to Igigi, through the Igigi /Manolo for the Big Girl contest!

Of course it is up to the Julie to decide how to use her prize, but Francesca wishes to point out that Igigi is having a huge sale which ENDS TODAY, and that for $250 one can purchase this fabulous assymetrical dress

AND the Donatella Dress

and still have a few dollars left over.

Francesca is just sayin’.

xoxo!

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Oh England, you bunch of green and pleasant nutjobs, do me a favor and put down ye merry olde cracke pype and let me lay a little church on you.

Size 8 is not fat.

Need to see it again? Okay.

SIZE 8 IS NOT FAT.

*sigh*

So remember the Miss England pageant, where a plus-size girl made the finals and we’re all “girl power” and when she didn’t win we pretty much heard nothing but crickets because

a) Fat Girl Loses Beauty Contest isn’t a headline (although she was First Runner-Up!)

b) British pageants are way, way boring. Frankly, if a beauty pageant doesn’t end up being turned into a Lifetime Original Movie with Valerie Bertinelli setting SOMEONE on fire with a flaming baton, then I don’t want to see it.

Well, it seems the reigning Miss England, Laura Coleman of Leicestershire (of whom I automatically approve on account that her fine county makes excellent cheeses) at a British size 10 –which is about an 8 on the other side of the pond– is being told she is too fat for a modeling career.

And the thing is, I’m not even a little bit surprised.

Sure, MAYBE a size 8 could be a catalog model these days, but for editorial high fashion stuff? No way. That’s the land of the size 0/2. Delightful, the world’s most beautiful xylophones. Not that there’s anything wrong with a naturally-occurring xylophone, but a little variation Maestro, if you please.

A beauty queen can’t get a job where the main requirement is being beautiful. That’s like me not being able to get a job where the main requirement is drinking gin and judging people (Confidential to my 9th Grade Career Counselor: HA HA TOLD YOU SO. AWESOME = ME. –ed.)

There’s ALWAYS going to be someone telling you you’re not beautiful enough. Always. You can be a size 0 or 8, 18 or 28 and you’re never, ever evereverever going to please the whole world.

So?

Screw ‘em. Set your own standards, create your own beauty, live the way you damn well feel and if they don’t like it well…I can’t legally say what to do, but it involves a cha cha heel, some vaseline and a trained Russian bear. Email me for the diagram.

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Lots of sales and announcements today. Since many of them end today, Francesca will put them all in one posting here, early in the morning, so you will have some time to take advantage:

ENDING TODAY: If you have a Bloomingdales charge card, use it today at their online store to buy $250 or more of merchandise, and you will receive a $50 gift card (which you must use by December 24). Francesca realizes that there are many restrictions on this offer, but she loves Bloomingdales! (And no, Bloomingdales is not one of our partners!)

Also at Bloomingdales, whether you use their charge card or not, get free shipping on orders of $100 or more through December 19 by entering code SHIPXMAS at checkout. Their plus-size section is here.

Francesca’s pick is a tafetta ruffle blouse, available in 4 colors in sizes 14 and 18:

(Do you like Tony Bennett? Watch him perform at Bloomingdales here.)

**

ENDS TODAY: Free shipping at Saks Fifth Avenue with code SFAGIFT. See their selection of clothing in sizes 14-24 here. Francesca’s pick is another tafetta blouse, this one available in sapphire (shown) or teal green in sizes 1x, 2x, and 3x:

Also at Saks, while supplies last: Buy $300 or more of La Mer beauty products, enter code LAMER22, and you’ll receive a gift bag with 4 La Mer samples: Creme de la Mer (0.24oz.), The Lifting Face Serum (0.17oz.), The Refining Facial (0.17oz.). and The Cleansing Foam (0.5oz.).

(Note to the poor girls: Francesca herself uses Noxema, L’Oreal and Maybelline and she maintains both a near-flawless complexion and a warm, subtle makeup look. She prefers to spend her monies on the clothing and the shoes. But she certainly understands the luxury and indulgence of the wonderful department-store-counter makeups! And, for the La Mer fan in your life, here is a luxurious gift set.)

Finally, for the gift shopping at Saks Fifth Avenue: make any purchase at Saks and you will get a free gift box with satin ribbon bow. To receive a complimentary gift box and bow during checkout, select “Yes, this order contains at least one gift,” and on the next page, choose Gift box with red ribbon (complimentary). This is not available to Canadian customers.

Here, it is the sale on the beautiful jewelry and accessories!

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ENDING TODAY: Get 30% off your entire order at Roaman’s (sizes 12W-44W) with promotion code RD17072.

Francesca’s pick, a silk beaded blouse available in three colors:

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New Sale at YOOX! We love their shoes. See all sales items here.

Francesca’s pick: Leather ankle boots by Celine (sorry for the blurry picture; the larger one would not load. They are gorgeous boots):

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Are you a Twilight fan? A reminder from Francesca that Torrid is selling Twilight (styles 1, 2, 3), “Team Edward” (styles 1, 2) and “Team Jacob” t-shirts. The price was just lowered to $18.

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Enter code alight543 at checkout, and get $5 off any Alight sale item of $15 or more. Alight carries sizes 14-30, with lots of great styles for the younger girl!

Now you can get that little shrug you know you’ve been needing, for just $17 (in 4 colors):

Happy shopping!

xoxo

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Our internet friend Karuna “Janey Garnet” Kearney writes:

Dear Francesca,

I hope that you will consider taking a look at living artists who celebrate the female form. I sell (and buy!) on Etsy, a wonderful site for all sorts of art and crafts. I took a quick look around, and found a few items you might be interested in featuring:

and my own:

The only thing better than celebrating big girls is celebrating big girls AND working artists!

Francesca says:

Indeed, the Francesca enjoys highlighting the talents of the living artists much more than those of the dead ones, and she is happy to do so now. She especially notes Karuna’s classiness, in listing the works of others before listing her own (and the photograph is fierce!)

The Big Girls in Art items make the excellent holiday gifts!

xoxo, Francesca

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Because there’s nothing hotter than a bunch of Cumbrian farmers in neckerchiefs and wellies dancing to Tom Jones. (possibly NSFW as there are bare bottoms and one truly unfortunate yet blessedly blurry cartwheel)

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