You'd have thought that everyone got so sick of hearing about the Tom Cruise/ Katie Holmes wedding last year that even the merest mention of it now would set the public off into all kinds of frightening involuntary convulsions.

But try telling that to David Hans Schmidt, who's just been arrested for trying to extort more than $1 million from Tom Cruise in return for him not publishing his stolen wedding photos to the world. Tom Cruise's people contacted the FBI and the arrest was made on Tuesday, further proof that you don't mess with Tom Cruise unless you want an angry midget getting the police on you. But, really, photos of Tom Cruise's wedding? Not only did that happen so long ago that everyone's stopped caring, but it was such a media-saturated event that everyone already knows everything anyway. Unless David Hans Schmidt had photos of Katie Holmes being transported to the wedding in a tiny veal cage with mascara running down her face, of course. Because they'd probably be worth a million dollars.

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