• You would think the elevator button is going to dispense $100 bills the way my children jostle to be the one to press it. It's always a fight ("I get to push it!" "No, it's my turn!")—as if this is so exciting. Guys. It's a little plastic button with a lightbulb behind it. Next year, we're skipping Disney and just going to stay in a cheap hotel with an elevator and go up and down all day long.

    • 1 of 5
  • Stickers at the checkout. My kids don't even really like stickers. Within 30 seconds of leaving the store, I'm getting handed a bunch of fuzz-backed stickers that no one wants anymore. But heaven help the clerk who doesn't offer them at Target or Trader Joe's. Because for that brief moment, they are just the most thrilling thing on Earth.

    • 2 of 5
  • Pouches, "squeezies"—whatever you call them, my kids are obsessed. Applesauce in a bowl? Snore. The exact same applesauce in a squeezie? My children will do anything you ask to get their hands on it. (Also, the markup on those things is insane. Every time we see one, my husband says, "Why didn't I invent those?")

    • 3 of 5
  • Maybe it's the forbidden fruit thing going on here, but my children think that Sharpies are the greatest writing tool known to man. A Crayola marker? Whatever. That same shade with the Sharpie logo? Like catnip.

    • 4 of 5
  • This is so much bang for your buck that it's unbelievable. I mean, a 50-cent bottle is gold for keeping your children entertained for a solid 30 minutes. Assuming you have enough breath to keep blowing bubbles for that long.

    • 5 of 5
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