Wearing normal, non-stretch clothing to Thanksgiving dinner is for amateurs (and people for whom the holiday is about more than just stuffing their face, but honestly, forget them), which is presumably why stuffing manufacturer Stove Top produced these so-called “Thanksgiving Dinner Pants.” With a maternity-style stretch waist (printed with a stuffing pattern, no less), they’re perfect for eating and drinking and drinking and eating until the tryptophan and alcohol join forces to knock you into oblivion for the next 12 hours. Or, you know, whatever your personal Thanksgiving Day traditions entail.
Unfortunately, the pants, which cost $19, are entirely sold out, a fact which is simultaneously depressing (because it means we can’t have them) and encouraging (because it means so many other people are prepared to take their Thanksgiving food consumption to a new level this year). Luckily, Stove Top is not the only maker of stretch pants in the land—just the only maker of ones with stuffing on them, which is probably a little too on the nose anyway.
If you’re in the market for pants that will allow your food baby to expand with all the tenacity of a real human child, consider these options: high-waisted leggings from Girlfriend Collective, cashmere sweatpants from Everlane, or fancy velvet pants from Anthropologie. Or, screw it, just go ahead an invest in some maternity jeans.