DATING
Our Best Tips For Navigating Being In Love With Someone You Can't Be With
By AMANDA CHATEL
We Can’t Control Love
Why people fall in love with someone varies, so when it comes to loving someone who doesn't love us back, we have to accept that we have zero control over who we love — and who they love. While it can feel good to hang onto the hope of "what if," accepting the reality of the situation is much healthier.
Create New Experiences
Rather than avoiding places you went to or songs that remind you of the person, create new memories and meanings instead. For example, if you and the person you loved always went to the same restaurant for special occasions, don't avoid the place for the rest of your life, go there and create new memories.
Friends and Family
Although some are content to hide behind their emotions and mental suffering by saying they're “fine" when they're not, try not to be one of those people. Unrequited love is complicated and, at times, can feel obsessive and all-consuming, so it’s important to open yourself up to supportive family and friends about what you're going through.
It's Not About You
People are going to love who they're going to love, and sometimes, we get lucky, and the person that we love happens to love us back, but other times it's just not the case. What's most important to realize is that it's not about you; someone not loving you doesn't say anything about your character or your ability to be loved.
Seek Professional Help
If it gets to a point where your obsession is off the charts, then it's time to see a therapist and talk to them to get objectivity. Not only is a therapist there to listen without bias, but they can offer techniques and methods that you can use on a daily basis to manage your feelings.