26 Tips To Help You Avoid Becoming A Bridezilla And Actually Enjoy Your Big Day

Are you getting married soon? The biggest mistake you could make would be showcasing excessive bridezilla behaviors in front of your loved ones. How regretful would you feel to learn that your soon-to-be spouse is doubting the future of your relationship based on your bridezilla tendencies? Avoid this by being mindful of your attitude and mood throughout the planning process. 


When the big day officially arrives, you must consistently remind yourself that getting your way in every area isn't always worth the trouble. Sometimes it's better to live and let live. It's perfectly fine to strive for a magical wedding day filled with beauty and bliss — after all, over-the-top weddings are back — but everyone around you shouldn't feel that they're suffering to help you achieve it. Many former bridezillas are still reeling from the aftermath of their regrettable ways far beyond their wedding day. Don't let that become your reality, too, with these tips.

Hire a wedding planner

Take nearly all the stress off of your shoulders immediately by hiring a savvy wedding planner who knows exactly what they're doing. Seasoned wedding planners have been in the game for years and understand the assignments laid in front of them. All you have to do is find a wedding planner you can trust and describe your vision in detail. They'll take what you tell them and help you create a masterpiece of a wedding. 


Having a wedding planner in your corner will keep you from crossing the line into bridezilla territory because they'll handle a lot of the tricky things that typically stress brides out. Bridezilla behavior is often born out of worry and stress, which means a wedding planner will be greatly beneficial to help you avoid reaching your breaking point. You can find wedding planners who are local to you in quick online searches. 

Keep your mind open to alternatives

You might already have a distinct vision of what you want your wedding day to look like, which is completely fine. Plenty of brides have daydreamed about their wedding starting in childhood! This doesn't mean, though, that you must stay stuck on whatever vision you're obsessing over if there are better alternatives. Keep an open mind regarding alternative options during the wedding planning process. 


Your future spouse could be leaning toward having a DJ instead of a live band. Even though that might not be what you want, take some time to think about it before completely shutting the idea down. Your future spouse could be enchanted by the notion of an outdoor wedding in a garden or meadow. Even if you're already dead-set on the notion of a beachside wedding venue, don't get overly rigid about each decision and keep your options open. 

Take unlimited breaks during the planning process

Try not to limit yourself to one or two breaks during the wedding planning process. Allow yourself to rest and take as many breaks as you need. Unlimited breaks are a must to avoid the high levels of stress that will hit you along the way. This isn't always easy to do if you're planning on having a short engagement with your partner, but it's certainly something to lean into if you have ample time before your wedding day. 


Remember that every single day on your calendar doesn't have to be dedicated to planning your wedding in some capacity. It's perfectly alright to take a few days off every now and then. Without taking any time off from the planning process, you're treating the process as if it's a full-time job. Approaching it this way is bound to lead to some bridezilla moments.

Avoid making every discussion with your fiancé about the wedding

Issues with your partner could arise if you can't help yourself from bringing up wedding topics in every conversation. Keep in mind that there are plenty of other unrelated topics to discuss. If you talk about the wedding too often, it could lead your partner down the path of burnout. Figure out what topics they want to talk about instead of harping on wedding decor, catering, and music playlists all the time.


Avoid turning every discussion with your fiancé into something wedding-related for the sake of their happiness and for the sake of your relationship. You'll be able to gauge if your partner is getting annoyed about wedding conversations after a while based on their responses and facial expressions. Respect them enough to chat about other interesting things, such as their workdays, their friendships, their excitement for upcoming holidays, and more.

Get grounded

Grounding techniques could be key for helping you stay away from that pesky bridezilla label if you tend to veer toward the dramatic. Unfortunately, many people disregard the power of grounding techniques because they don't think these methods actually work or make a difference. The good news is that grounding techniques most definitely work if you're willing to put forth the effort and try them out. A few examples include dipping your hands in water, reaching out to touch items near you, breathing deeply, eating comforting food, or taking a short walk. 


You could also try clutching a piece of ice, savoring a pleasant scent, moving your body, or listening to your surrounding environment. The power of grounding is that doing so forces you to acknowledge the present moment and become aware of it. This can ease mental discomfort in people with anxiety, depression, and even bridezilla mood swings.

Assign clear tasks to everyone involved

Say goodbye to your bridezilla mentality by assigning clear tasks to everyone involved in your wedding. As soon as you find peace in knowing that every task is successfully going to be handled by someone you trust, it will be difficult for your bridezilla side to surface. The idea of having to handle everything on your own would make anyone feel as if they have the weight of the world on their shoulders. Who wouldn't act out and lose their cool while feeling that way? 


Give yourself some grace and gently ask those involved in your wedding to take on different tasks to lighten your load. As soon as you accept that you're not actually alone, you'll start feeling at ease about everything going on around you. Your fiancé, your parents, your bridal party, and everyone who cares about you will be willing to help you out.

Distance yourself from anyone giving you more stress

Since bridezilla behavior is typically linked to stress, distancing yourself from anyone who's adding more stress to your plate is completely essential. Your future mother-in-law might constantly call you or drop by unannounced, but that doesn't mean you have to subject yourself to looming frustration. This is a common scenario for brides who find their mother-in-law to be overbearing or judgmental. 


If you'd rather swim with sharks than be stuck in a room with her, it's okay to excuse yourself politely. Maybe another family member or friend is the cause of your inner turmoil right now. Whoever it is may never actually stop bothering you, but you still have the freedom to limit your time around them. Do so to the best of your abilities. In some cases, little white lies are acceptable because your peace of mind should always be prioritized.

Create a helpful wedding website for you and your guests

Setting up a wedding website takes some pressure off your shoulders. Instead of fielding calls from family and friends who have endless questions, they can access important details there. Why would bridezilla need to show up if no one's poking and prodding her all day? Bridezilla has no motivation to rear her head if her guests are handling things through the website she's set up.


Wedding websites can help jumpstart the planning process after getting engaged. They are also helpful for more than collecting RSVPs. Guests can note any food allergies or dietary restrictions they have while also purchasing thoughtful gifts from the registry. Guests can admire lovely engagement photos while taking note of the venue address, dress code, and other details — no need to bother you when the information is readily available (as long as they're relatively tech savvy and remember to use it).

Utilize a wedding planning book

Whether or not you've got a professional wedding planner on your team, wedding planning organizational books are completely necessary. Sure, a wedding planner typically takes care of most things related to your wedding, but this type of hand-held planner will keep you aligned with the progress being made. Make sure your wedding planner confirms every detail with you so you're able to keep your organizational book up to date and don't fall behind.


This type of organizational book comes in handy for budget brides who have chosen to forgo hiring a professional wedding planner altogether. Here, you'll be able to log your vendors' details, makes notes about your bridal party, and even start figuring out seating charts. Wedding planning organizational books are available at most stores such as Target and Walmart. You can also use virtual options that you access through websites or apps including Etsy.

Keep your wedding expectations realistic

Your bridezilla side is bound to come out if you can't maintain realistic expectations throughout the process. Striving for a lovely day isn't a problem, but striving for things completely out of reach will start to impede your happiness. Take your budget into account before adding ideas to your wedding dream board. If you've got a budget of $25,000 for your wedding, hiring a string quartet and releasing $1,000 doves down the aisle might not fit the bill. You may also want to consider a minimalist wedding to save money and stress.


Your vision of serving decadent three-course meals to all your guests sounds magical, but if the budget only allows for buffet-style dining, just accept it and let it go. Getting worked up about unmet expectations puts a strain on you and everyone around you, so keep your expectations in the realm of possibility. 

Schedule regular and consistent therapy sessions

Even if therapy isn't something you've experienced before, it's something to explore during the wedding planning process. Sitting down regularly with your therapist can help you stay on track by keeping you away from any bridezilla tendencies before they surface. Therapists are trained professionals who specialize in mental health. Whatever's weighing you down or stressing you out can be thoroughly discussed and worked through with a thoughtful therapist who has your best interests at heart. 


You might not find your ideal match for a therapist in one try, but that's not a problem. You're free to continue bouncing around between different therapists until you find someone you genuinely connect with. You're only going to be engaged for a limited period of time, and your wedding day only lasts for 24 hours. Don't be disappointed in yourself for needing some extra help along the way.

Consider meeting with an energy healer

Energy healers help people heal from the inside out. If you feel as if your mental health is on the decline from all the stress you're feeling about your wedding, an energy healer could be exactly what you need. Energy healers go out of their way to help you release any negative dark energy and bad spirits lingering around you and weighing you down. 


They help cleanse your aura to bring back any vibrancy, joy, and peace you've been missing. Unfortunately, the good work that energy healers do isn't always taken seriously in Western society, but that doesn't mean you have to close yourself off from it. If you approach the journey of an energy healing session with an open mind, you might be surprised at how much it helps you. Simply request help from an energy healer to avoid any potential bridezilla moods.

Be patient and kind to all hired staff

Just because you're getting married doesn't mean you can forget that other people are humans, too. It's crucial that you are patient and kind to all the hired staff members at your wedding. This includes vendors such as your photographer, caterers, and performers. Treating hired help as if they are less than human (simply because they're earning a paycheck as hired help) automatically gives you the label of a bridezilla. 


It's not fair for people to be treated badly as they do their best to earn a living in a service-based position. Even if you want to feel like total royalty on your wedding day, this doesn't mean the people you've hired deserve to be treated badly in the process. Keep in mind that members of the royal family and other celebrities have been recognized for treating their hired staff with kindness.

Have a plan B for everything

If you don't already have a plan B lined up for every single aspect of your wedding, it's safe to assume that a bridezilla mood swing or two will eventually surface. You probably won't be too happy if something goes wrong. The easiest way to avoid this is to make sure you've got a plan B lined up for anything that can go wrong. For example, if the weather doesn't permit your wedding to take place outside, make sure there's an indoor venue nearby in which for your guests to relocate. 


For example, if the wedding cake accidentally gets smashed, make sure you have other dessert options available, or be sure to have a smaller and less expensive back-up cake on deck. If the singer hired for your wedding ends up catching the flu, have another talented singer who could fill in on speed-dial.

Be cognizant of the content you consume

It's vital you're cognizant of the content you consume while planning your wedding. In other words, you shouldn't watch loads of videos on social media or reality TV shows showcasing bridezillas acting out. There's a reality TV show called "Bridezillas" that specifically focuses on women who lose their cool and make regrettable decisions on camera in front of millions of viewers. 


Although it sounds like a silly show to binge-watch in the midst of your boredom, it's not actually something you should consume on a consistent basis if those aren't behaviors you want to emulate in your own personal life. Instead, opt for entertainment that's high-vibrational and filled with happy people making good life choices they won't live to regret for many years to come. Go ahead and unfollow any social media accounts that are keeping you in a low-vibrational state as well.

Don't be pushy about going over your wedding budget

A tell-tale sign of a bridezilla is someone who gets super pushy with their parents or fiancé about going over budget. For example, if everyone has collectively decided that the budget for the wedding will be no more than $25,000, you shouldn't start throwing a fit every time others vocalize a need to stick to that budget. It doesn't matter if you've come across the most gorgeous centerpieces ever if it will take your budget over the limit. 


No one wants to tell a bride "no" in the midst of wedding planning. Putting other people in that position is super uncomfortable and downright rude. As soon as the budget is collectively decided, be willing to accept the final number for what it is without trying to convince others to spend more money than they'd like to at the last minute.

Be mindful of how much alcohol you consume on your big day

There's no harm in drinking some wine or champagne on your wedding day, but it can become a problem if you get totally belligerent before walking down the aisle. Throwing back a shot or two to calm your nerves is also something that's generally considered socially acceptable by society. Still, you need to know your limits and stop before you take things way too far with alcohol. 


Some brides opt for completely sober weddings without a single drop of alcohol available at all, though you don't have to be that strict about it as long as you're fully aware of your own personal limits. Getting intoxicated beyond the point of return on your wedding day means you instantly become burdensome to your loved ones at a moment when you're supposed to be clearheaded enough to celebrate with everyone.

Avoid comparing yourself to other brides

Stop yourself in your tracks before comparing yourself to other brides. Whether you've seen brides you feel envious of on social media, on television, or in your own friend group, these are thoughts to nip in the bud immediately. The more you compare yourself to other brides, the more likely you are to turn into a bridezilla. If you feel that your wedding day is turning out completely inadequate compared to the wedding days of others, you'll probably want to lash out in anger and frustration. 


You can avoid this altogether by stopping yourself as soon as you feel comparative thoughts start creeping into your mind. Every single wedding is special and beautiful in its own way. Wedding venues, dresses, cakes, and other details simply don't need to be compared. These details truly don't need to be analyzed side-by-side if it make you feel inadequate in any way.

Be mindful that it's your fiancé's wedding day, too

Something important to remember on your wedding day is that it's your fiancé's wedding day, too. This means that a lot of their desires for the wedding should be acknowledged. It's not all about you, since you're not the only one tying the knot. Getting married is a big deal for both people involved, as two people are making a lifelong commitment to each other. 


That said, some of the wishes your fiancé has for the wedding day should be incorporated into your planning. You might not see eye to eye about every single detail, but that doesn't mean you can't come to compromises every once in a while. It's also important that you show signs of your willingness to make sacrifices as well. A willingness to make sacrifices is symbolic of a strong foundation for your future marriage.

Remember that your wedding day only happens once

Your wedding day only happens once. Keep that in mind. Even if you get divorced and remarry someone else later on in your life, this particular wedding day with this particular partner is only going to happen one time! When you put things into perspective like this, it becomes easier to ditch the bridezilla act for a while. Who wants to think back on their wedding day to be reminded of bridezilla behaviors that poured out from every angle? 


Every time you think back on your wedding, you should be filled with warm and fuzzy feelings about the incredible day it was. Acting like a bridezilla will completely ruin that for you because you'll end up looking back with embarrassment, shame, and regret, and your chances of reminiscing on nostalgia will dwindle. This day happens once, so be careful with your approach.

Accept all help you can get from loved ones

In your mind, you might think that no one else will be able to do anything the way you're envisioning it to be. Even so, it's your job to accept all the help you can get from your loved ones throughout the wedding planning process. This is important because being able to accept help from others without being resistant or closed off will help you avoid turning into a major bridezilla.


Bridezillas who feel as if they're forced to handle everything on their own without any help grow resentful, angry, and aggressive over time. Not getting any help from others is a recipe for disaster. If your friends, family members, and loved ones are willingly offering you help along the way to lighten your load, say "yes" even if you don't think they're going to do everything as flawlessly as you would.

Ditch the desire to demand perfection through micromanagement

If you've ever been micromanaged at work, you already know how frustrating it can be. Having someone constantly look over your shoulder and breathe down your neck makes you feel suffocated, angry, and trapped. Employees who work under micromanagers often end up quitting prematurely to seek employment elsewhere. Keep this in mind before turning into a micromanaging bridezilla with your loved ones. 


Your parents, members of your bridal party, and your fiancé don't deserve to be micromanaged based on your dream of experiencing a perfect wedding. You can't be so demanding that you scare people off and make them want to stay away from you. Odds are, the more micromanaging you do, the more issues you're going to have with the people you care about most. You can make your desires known, but don't become a bossy micromanager while you're at it.

Don't expect preferential treatment simply because you're a bride

You shouldn't expect preferential treatment simply because you're a bride. Yes, you're getting married, and, yes, that's very exciting. Still, it doesn't mean you can cut in lines at stores while shopping for wedding favors. It doesn't mean you can speak to wedding dress sales associates with disrespect and impatience. It doesn't mean you can talk down to vendors who aren't specifically meeting your needs. 


Being a bride doesn't suddenly mean you're a movie star who sits up on a pedestal for others to worship. It simply means you're getting married to someone you love soon. Expecting preferential treatment is incredibly toxic since there's nothing inherently world-changing about what you're doing. Maintain the same energy you've always had during your wedding planning process and on your big day. Continue to be the same person you were before your engagement.

Take your bridal party's concerns seriously

If your bridal party is vocalizing their concerns about your bridezilla behavior, take it to heart without instantly getting offended. Chances are, members of your bridal party don't feel too comfortable bringing the truth to you about their feelings. If they felt the need to speak up to you about how badly you've been acting, you should see it as a huge red flag about your behavior. 


No one wants to make a bride feel badly during the wedding planning process. If members of your bridal party had to leave their comfort zones to tell you about their concerns, it probably wasn't the easiest thing for them to do. Most people would rather avoid confrontation because it's awkward and uncomfortable. Butting heads with people you care about never feels pleasant. Acknowledge their concerns, and take it upon yourself to make some immediate changes.

Don't neglect self-care

Keeping up with regular self-care practices throughout the wedding planning process helps keep brides in a healthy-minded state. This means monthly massages and nail salon trips should stay on the calendar. Any other self-care practices you love are still essential. If you were regularly going to the massage parlor and the nail salon before getting engaged, these aren't things you should give up now that you're planning a wedding. 


Sure, you might be way busier than before with all of the things you have on your plate, but you still need to carve out time to take care of yourself. When you're nurturing yourself with self-care, you feel more peaceful in your day-to-day life. Wedding planning can be super stressful, but taking care of yourself along the way gives you the opportunity to keep a level head without losing your cool or lashing out at anyone.

Don't prioritize a picture-perfect wedding day over your actual relationship

Your relationship with your future spouse should be your top priority. In other words, you certainly shouldn't prioritize the results of a picture-perfect wedding day over your actual relationship. You and your partner are embarking on the journey of marriage, which is a lifelong commitment, while a wedding day only lasts for 24 hours. 


When it's put into perspective, what becomes more of a priority to you in the grand scheme of things? Your actual relationship should be far more important to you than your wedding day alone. Of course, you're going to love looking back at memories of your wedding day years into the future with your partner, but to help ensure you have a happy marriage, you have to make sure your relationship can stand the test of time beyond the picture-perfect wedding day you're vividly imagining.