It makes sense that someone would drop a chunk of change on a luxury item. Brand power is real, after all, and a pair of Prada shoes will (hopefully) last a lifetime. A confusing venture, though, is the retail of expensive everyday items by luxury brands, resulting in ridiculous designer products, like a $350 straw or $200 duct tape (yes, we’ll get to that later).
Slapping a designer logo on a household item will certainly give it an aesthetic edge, but is it worth it? For someone in a certain tax bracket, probably. Case in point: Kim Kardashian’s Louis Vuitton trash cans.
But for the majority of people (read: normal human beings), these products are laughable at best. Read on to discover some of the most absurd goods on the market.
Apologies! It should be noted that this is not just a rock — it’s a “leather wrapped stone.” Does that make up for the steep price tag on an item that can be found in the backyard? Probably not. Though the description on Nordstrom’s website certainly tries to convince you otherwise: “A paperweight? A conversation piece? A work of art?,” the website reads. “It’s up to you, but this smooth Los Angeles-area stone — wrapped in rich, vegetable-tanned American leather secured by sturdy contrast backstitching — is sure to draw attention wherever it rests.” To be clear, the pouch is created by Made Solid while the rock is created by the Earth. “Only Mother Earth can take credit for rocks,” a Nordstrom rep told Buzzfeed. In the unlikely event that you are reaching for your credit card, there’s some bad news: The item is currently sold out.
This piece comes from Tiffany & Co.’s “Everyday Objects” collection, which according to their website, “elevates everyday home and garden accessories with a wit that transforms the ordinary into works of art.” Given this description, it’s unclear whether these paddles are meant to be played with or merely rested atop a mantel as a decor piece. Either way, they can be yours for the price of three car payments.
Jil Sander’s $290 Paper Bag
Why not elevate your sack lunch to the next level? This literal paper bag graced the 2012 fall-winter runway in the clasped hand of a sharply-dressed male model, courtesy of German designer Jil Sanders. The item is unfortunately no longer sold, but if you’re feeling spend-y, the fashion house is currently selling a clear plastic bag for a cool $780.
Louis Vuitton’s first-ever audio equipment makes Air Pods look like child’s play. The French designer collaborated with audio brand Master & Dynamic to create wireless headphones, emblazoned with the famous “LV.” At nearly $1000, the price could cover one month’s rent for most. However, the headphones come in three colorways, each with a sleek, stainless steel charging case that offers ten hours of battery life, so it just might be worth it. Right?
Who needs belts? They’re restrictive and can make sitting down super uncomfortable. This seems to be the perspective of menswear designer Raf Simons, who sent models down the runway in 2017 sporting 2″ wide duct tape around their waists as an accessory. You can currently purchase it for $280 through online retailer Farfetch, which seems steep for something that will be thrown in the trash after one use.