Tips For Reforming Your Bad Texter Ways
In many ways, technology has made our lives more convenient than it was for generations of the past. Texting, in particular, has made it quick and easy to relay instant messages without having to resort to phone conversations or, god forbid, face-to-face interaction. But one of the downsides to texting is that an etiquette has naturally formed around this modern communication method, and if you break the rules, you're branded as a bad texter.
As so many areas of our modern lives are wrapped up in this technology, being a bad texter can impact many things in your world, from work to relationships. For example, the single pride and dating blog This Is Why I'm Single highlights how easy it is to confuse a bad texter for someone who's just not romantically interested in you.
So if you want to improve your relationships and avoid the dreaded dry text conversations, it's worth rectifying the moves that make you a bad texter. While there's no clear definition of what a good texter is, you can avoid being a bad one by steering clear of a few common mistakes.
Don't give one-word responses
One-word responses usually send the message that you don't want to talk anymore. Unless this is your intention, kick this habit to the curb. Dating and relationships website Bolde explains that this kind of response isn't mysterious or alluring; it's "obnoxious."
Marriage.com also confirms that one-word responses (or worse, one-letter responses) can sound rude, so it's worth trying to put a little more effort into your texts. If you don't have time to respond properly, let the other person know that. Or wait until you do have time to respond before crafting a reply.
Initiate the conversation (sometimes)
Letting the other person do all the work is bad form in a relationship, and the same goes with texting. If you care about the person texting you, whether it's someone you're dating, a colleague, or a family member, then remember to text them first at least some of the time. Simply taking this initiative can turn you from a lousy texter to a great one.
LovePanky explains that this tip is especially important when you're texting someone you're interested in romantically. While not texting first may be part of your plan to play hard to get, relationships tend to be healthier and happier when games are left at the door.
Treat business texts differently
One of the reasons why there are no clear-cut rules on how to be a great texter is because the expectations shift depending on who you're texting. Obviously, a different standard applies when you're texting your boss than it does when texting your friends.
When sending a work-related text, try to respond as soon as possible. The Thirty points out that you shouldn't leave business texts waiting, even if it's okay to leave people you're closer with on read sometimes. New York-based psychologist Heather Silvestri, Ph.D., tells the publication that "tardiness is problematic in both a practical and relational way" when you're dealing with texts that are time-urgent, as they tend to be with work-related matters.
Try not to be repetitive
It turns out that being a bad texter isn't just how you text; it's also the messages that you send. As a rule of thumb, try not to repeat yourself too much in your texts. When you always say the same thing, you become predictable, which makes people less likely to want to text you, per Navigating Through.
Luckily, this problem is pretty easy to fix. Read over your texts before you send them and keep an eye out for phrases or responses that you always use. Be creative with other ways to get across the same message so the person you're texting doesn't feel bored with your conversation.
Don't rush your texts
A common misconception about texting etiquette is that you have to reply as soon as you see the text. But in a world where many of us are bombarded with multiple texts a day (plus emails and social media notifications), it's not realistic to reply the second you receive a new notification (via Channel News Asia). You might have a multitude of reasons why you don't respond straight away, from wanting to reply to all your texts at once to taking the time to craft the perfect response.
The Thirty stresses that responding too late can leave a bad impression with people you don't know well, or to texts that are time-sensitive. But in general conversations with people you know, things are a little more relaxed. It's better to send a well-thought-out text that takes a little longer to craft than a hasty one-word response.