Why Does Owning A Home Make A Potential Partner More Attractive? We Asked A Neuropsychologist
Compatibility, character, loyalty, empathy, a sense of humor, and a stable job are all qualities likely to be on the docket when you ask someone what they're looking for in a potential partner. But what about homeownership? Does owning a home really up the attractiveness of a prospective significant other?
To answer this, we talked to Dr. Sanam Hafeez, a New York City-based neuropsychologist and the director of Comprehend the Mind, for a professional take on the matter. "Homeownership often symbolizes stability and responsibility, creating an impression of a person capable of making long-term commitments. The idea of having a permanent residence contributes to a sense of security, both financially and emotionally, fostering an environment conducive to a stable relationship," Dr. Hafeez exclusively told Glam.
So, for those looking to settle down, a partner who has a firm sense of security might be more appealing. Homeownership as a single person might inspire confidence that one is serious about commitment, won't waste your time, and has a steady path in life. "Additionally, homeownership is commonly perceived as a significant achievement, reflecting success and the ability to accomplish long-term goals, traits that can enhance a person's appeal," Dr. Hafeez added. "These psychological factors collectively improve the desirability of a partner who owns a home." Still, while the short answer as to whether or not homeownership makes a potential partner more attractive may be yes, there are other key factors to consider, too.
Be sure you're looking at the full picture in your relationship
Homeownership may be a definite plus in a potential partner — particularly for millennials who might have given up on the idea of owning a home altogether — but if it overrides other important qualities necessary for a healthy relationship, then it's key to pause and evaluate your attraction. "While homeownership can be appealing, remember that it's just one aspect of a person's life. Consider other qualities such as character, shared interests, and emotional compatibility," Dr. Sanam Hafeez exclusively shared with Glam. "Assess the overall health and dynamics of your relationship. Look for signs of mutual respect, effective communication, and emotional support, as these factors are crucial for a successful and lasting partnership."
If those green flags are all present in your relationship, then, hey, enjoy homeownership as an added bonus. But it's also important to consider whether or not you're on the same path and desire the same lifestyle. If one of you is aiming for a quiet life and the other envisions a big family, then homeownership isn't the main quality you're looking for and shouldn't be treated as the end-all-be-all quality of a perfect partner. "Assess whether you and your partner share similar long-term goals beyond homeownership. Compatibility in life goals, family planning, and values is crucial for a successful partnership," added Dr. Hafeez.
Homeownership is a plus, but it doesn't guarantee a happier relationship
While we've established that dating someone who owns a home can bring an element of groundedness and stability to a relationship — and can certainly make a potential partner more attractive — it doesn't necessarily translate into relationship success. "Couples who start with one partner already owning a home might experience a sense of stability and security, but this doesn't guarantee a happier relationship. On the other hand, couples who embark on the journey of buying their first home together may find joy and satisfaction in building a shared future," Dr. Hafeez exclusively told Glam.
Essentially, shared values, communication, and emotional compatibility are the building stones of a healthy relationship, and homeownership simply isn't a replacement for them. That doesn't mean you won't find a potential mate who's secured a home more alluring; it simply means that both parties must still put in the required work for a thriving, healthy connection. "The key to a successful relationship lies in effective communication, shared values, mutual respect, and navigating challenges together. Whether a couple dates someone with a home or buys their first home together doesn't inherently determine a relationship's happiness level," Dr. Hafeez explained. With that, you can rest easily and know that it's a plus but not the crux of joy or relationship satisfaction at large.