Should The 'Quiet Quitting' Trend Be Applied To Your Dating Life Too?
You may have heard the phrase "quiet quitting" when related to work-life balance. TikTok user @zkchillin (now @zaidleppelin), whose use of the term has gone viral, defines quiet quitting as "not outright quitting your job" but "quitting the idea of going above and beyond." Those who quiet quit are still performing their duties, but they're "no longer subscribing to the hustle culture mentality that work has to be your life."
The idea behind quiet quitting is a good one. Those who practice this type of work make sure to leave work at work, refuse to answer emails outside of working hours, and carve out a clear boundary between home and their careers. These are all ways to keep a healthy balance in your life so you can be sure that work does not take over your family time or social life.
However, there are people out there who argue that applying quiet quitting to your dating life could benefit you in many ways. Because if you let it, searching for your soulmate can take over your life, per The Atlantic. Constant swiping, long phone calls, and incessant texting can be overwhelming and contribute to relationship anxiety. The idea behind quiet quitting while dating works in a similar way to quiet quitting in the work place: It's a way to draw boundaries for yourself. This approach can help you mentally, and give you the peace you seek while you search for your person.
Upholding boundaries while dating
Just like in the work place, quiet quitting while dating is all about deciding what you're comfortable with when it comes to those who demand your time and attention. Let's be honest: Your time is precious, so surrounding yourself with people who understand that is vital for a healthy dating life. The Guardian explains that quiet quitting in the workplace is just doing the bare minimum, and your dating life could actually benefit from this same mindset. There are ways to quiet quit that will harm no one and actually help you find peace. To conserve your energy, give yourself a set of defined values that are non-negotiable while searching for that special someone. Psych Alive explains that ideal traits to look for in a partner include maturity, honesty, respect, and affection. If you have those clearly outlined before engaging in time-consuming conversation, you'll be able to walk away from someone who doesn't match your values more easily.
In addition, scrolling for hours trying to find a person who completes you can take a toll on your mental well-being. Establish a time frame for scrolling and stick to it (via Insider). Maybe all you need is 20 to 30 minutes of time searching through matches each day. When your time is up, move on to other activities that fill your bucket. Forcing yourself to quiet quit the endless searching may be the best gift you can give yourself.
Take time out for yourself
If constant cycles of searching for that special someone have taken an emotional toll on you, Elite Daily suggests taking a break and giving yourself some time. If you find yourself trying to force a relationship, part of quiet quitting would be acknowledging your feelings, taking a step back, and even considering pausing your search for a while. Headspace explains that healthy relationships take time and effort, so use this opportunity to put all your focus into yourself until you're ready to date again.
Quiet quitting in the workplace is a way to draw certain boundaries for yourself about what you're willing to do and when you're willing to do it. It's a way to honor your mental health and leisure time. Quiet quitting while dating relies on the same idea. If you find yourself wrapped up in potential partners, losing hours a day to swiping and scrolling, and becoming overly frustrated that your search doesn't produce quality partners, define the characteristics you are looking for and consider giving yourself a break from dating. You're worth the boundaries and the pause.